He crawls out of bed from another sleepless night. He is welcomed by sunshine, but closes the blinds. The darkness feeds what is on the inside. Lost and alone, bruised and scared he just wants to be left alone.
He doesn’t want you to visit, he doesn’t want a phone call. He wants to isolate himself in the silence. He wants to try to make sense of the mess that he has made. Looking back he can see where he went off the path, but getting back on that path is the struggle.
He wants to run and hide from everything that reminds him of the hurt. He stays up all night thinking of how things could have went different. “Why did I do what I did, Why didn’t I do what I should have done?” The thoughts consume him like a volcano full of lava.
The addiction is eating at him like a flea on a dog. Every second of every day he just wants more. A moment without it is a moment too long. The addiction is life, failure, escape. It causes so much destruction, yet he still want to be close to it.
“Why do I love misery, Why do I love you?” The thought without it makes him sick. Even the smallest thing will trigger his desire to want it. He might go a day maybe a week without it, but I fall for it all over again, a vicious cycle he can’t stop.
He feels helpless, out of control and lifeless without it. He is building a wall around him, the wall is getting stronger and stronger and is making it harder for help to come through it. When will he realize what this is doing? When will he finally break the chain?
I will not sit by and watch him struggle, I will do my part and free him of this vicious cycle. Come with me and stay clean. Join a family that will not judge. Let us help you and together we will help us. Don’t let this destroy you because it’s not too late. Today is your new day and together we will have a new life!
Addiction comes in many forms. It can be drugs, alcohol, gambling, sex, shopping or anything that causes destruction in your life that you can’t live without. Whatever your addiction, break free today. Don’t look back but grab a hold and start a new journey! Allow others to help you and finally feel the freedom of life!
© Tim Foster – 2015